The Driving Value – Part 2

Live intentionally - lego

A History of My Own Driving Values

When I was a kid, I was more like my younger son and attempted to avoid pain more than seek pleasure. As I got older (later high school and early college years) my driving value shifted to hard work.

Because of my academic limitations I  realized I had to work harder than my peers to achieve the same level of success. So that’s just what I did. For me it wasn’t just about the success that my hard work created. It was about living up to my potential and being proud of myself.

I knew I would never be the stand out student in any of my classes, but I took great pleasure in knowing that no one would have worked harder or spent more time reading/studying than I would have. This value extended into my early adulthood as I began to collect jobs at one point working four different jobs.Continue reading →

The Driving Value – Part 1

lego figure running into the street for a ball

“Live your days on the positive side of life, in tune with your most treasured values. And in each moment you’ll have much to live for.”

-Ralph Marston

I believe that understanding your values is essential in getting the most out of life. To becoming the best version of yourself possible. We all have things in our life that matter to us and bring us joy and meaning. By gaining insight into these values we can better merge them into our daily experiences.

This blog is a perfect example of a value in action. One of my core values is my family and specifically my kids. Knowing this, I’ve constructed my life so I can incorporate this value into it.

I’ve happily chosen to give up career advancement for the opportunity to spend more time with my children. Arranging my work schedule to give me the most possible opportunity to interact with my children. I made these choices because I knew what my values were and was willing to alter my life to fit them.Continue reading →

Books

“You will be the same person in five years as you are today except for the people you meet and the books you read.”

 – Charlie “Tremendous” Jones

Boys my Boys,

Books (and now a days blogs/podcasts/YouTube Videos) will change your life for the better. One of my many hopes for you is that you are avid readers and seekers of knowledge and wisdom.

It’s been my experience that the right book at the right time can alter the course of your life and set you on a journey toward growth and self-realization.

If you read with an open mind and an open heart, your life will improve. You’ll have a richer more meaningful existence. You’ll understand yourself, the people in your life, and the world as a whole a lot better, simply because you have chosen to read.Continue reading →

Vulnerability

lego man, vulnerability

“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.”

– Criss Jami

The goal of this blog is to give my sons an inside look at who I am. In order to provide them with this insiders perspective, I know I have to be as vulnerable and open as possible. Unfortunately, this does not come naturally to me.

I am not innately a ‘heart on my sleeve’ type of person. Nor would I characterize myself as guarded or defensive either; I just tend to keep to myself.

At my father’s funeral service, there wasn’t a eulogy, but rather an open microphone for those in attendance to share their thoughts or memories. The service went on for hours as people lined up to share their experiences and reflections.

It was heartwarming to hear from the many people that cared for my father, but it was a little sad to realize that they knew a version of him I had not yet gotten to know and now never would.

From everything that was said, one particular comment has always stuck out.Continue reading →

Five Lessons I Learned from my Father’s Death

“It is not so much about what life hands you, but what you do with what you get.”

– Idowu Koyenikan

lego grave, lego grief, lego funeralIn my introductory post, I shared that the origins of this blog started with my father’s death. I thought it appropriate that my follow-up post be about the lessons I learned from his passing.

I don’t want to give you the impression that this was an easy process. It wasn’t easy at all. It was painful and it took me many many years before I was able to find anything resembling a silver lining from this tragedy.

However, now nearly twenty years later I’m able to reflect back and see how his death influenced my growth and shaped my outlook. Here are just a few of the ways I was able to take this tragedy and make my life better from it.Continue reading →