Boys my Boys,
Change is inevitable. It is an unrelenting part of life. You’ll either learn to adapt or constantly feel off kilter. Recognizing the need for change in your life will put you in the drivers seat. However, this requires acknowledging that there is some deficiency in your life, either in your circumstances or in your character.
After identifying the deficiency, you’ll need to correct it. You’ll have to figure out how to make the necessary corrections in your life.
But not all changes will be difficult, in fact many will be welcome. You’ll identify a problem and make the necessary adjustments. These changes are a key ingredient in finding fulfillment and living up to your potential.
While they may not seem like much, these welcome changes get you in the habit of evaluating your life and making improvements. This habit will make it easier for you to identify the more challenging changes you’ll need to make.
You’ll have to make difficult changes in your life as well; changes that aren’t obvious and won’t be made easily. I want to share my philosophy on change in hopes that it can offer you some insight.
Some people suggest a “fake it till you make it” approach. Changing their habits in the hopes that their thoughts or beliefs will follow. I’ve personally never had much success with this philosophy.
I’ve found that if my mind is not fully on board with a change, then my heart won’t be in it either. In order to get my mind on board I first need to understand. Understanding is the gatekeeper to change.
In order to understand, I must find the “why”. Why am I changing? Or put another way, what end result is worth the work necessary to create change in my life?
My why could be selfish, it will make my life better or it could be more altruistic, like making me a better father, husband, friend, or global citizen.
For me it is necessary to keep this why at the forefront because it will continue to provide motivation as I go through the change process. And this process will be fraught with opportunities to lose motivation.
I also need to understand the what. What exactly is it that I’m trying to change into? The more I educate myself about the change, the better equipped I am to make it.
It is during this stage that I determine the aspects of the change that work in my life and those that don’t. After determining the why and what, we must address the how.
For me, the how is immersion. I’ve found that if I want to adopt a new way of thinking, I must educate and immerse myself in this new philosophical outlook.The best way to change is to immerse yourself in the change you wish to achieve. Click To Tweet
This usually involves reading books, blogs, listening to podcasts, or talking to others who are living out the desired value. I allow myself to slowly accept the new ideas that fit for me. Then challenge and reject the ideas or beliefs that may not fit.
Creating lasting change in your life is a slow process. I’ve had to be patient with myself during this journey. It has taken months and sometimes years to transform my life. Getting discouraged is a part of the process. However, overcoming these setbacks is how the change gets solidified in your life.
Love Dad'You must be the change you wish to see in the world.' - Mahatma Gandhi Click To Tweet